Based on the work of Aaron Beck and later David Burns, the following is an abbreviated list of the more common “cognitive distortions” 1920 : They can be hard to catch, because they can take place in various ways. One of the first steps to overcoming our negative self-talk is to identify them as they are happening. Over time, as this pattern deepens, we can see any self-mishap as an indictment of ourselves. Over time we can enter what psychologists call, “confirmation bias”, wherein we start making up our minds about our subject, such as how we see ourselves, and then interpret any new evidence as a confirmation of that self-perception 18. Rather than taking the time to reflect and consider each situation before coming up with a judgement, to save on time and energy it is easier for the mind to skip straight to judgement. It should be noted, that for the sake of simplicity, the brain likes to create patterns to make thinking easier. At this point, we will take our interpretation one step further, creating labels about ourselves – “I’m such a horrible person for making him mad” (rather than just acknowledging it as a simple mistake) and/or assuming our friend is a horrible person. However, if we come from a home where a parent is frequently mad at the things we do and/or if we have more anxious temperament to begin with, our reaction to making our friend mad is going to be that much more powerful, with stronger feelings of guilt and shame 17. For example, if you do something as a child to make your friend mad, your initial reaction may just be, “I guess I better not do that again”. Our prior experiences with others along with our inborn personality traits shape those interpretations.
Īs we are growing up, we encounter situations that trigger those biochemicals, which we’re then left to interpret. Consequently, making a mistake tends to be harder on our physiology, in an attempt to make a lasting impression on our brain 16. A large reason why we hate making mistakes, is that as powerful as the happy biochemicals are, they do not linger in the body nearly as long as the unhappy biochemicals (chiefly cortisol) 15. To aid in this process, the body and the brain have plenty of hormones and neurotransmitters to guide you in this process. To be fair, such thoughts serve a purpose, including protecting us from the various dangers of the world, both physical and social. But as I was going up on stage I had nagging thought, “They’re going to figure out I don’t really deserve this.” Needless to say, staying optimistic isn’t always easy, negative thoughts can haunt us even in the best of situations.
I remember walking up on stage to receive my doctoral degree, it was one of the proudest moments of my life.
Place caption here How do I avoid negative thoughts?
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